


Thoughts Full

by jayilave



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Gen, Injured Lance, Langst, Other, imagine, mind reader lance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2017-12-28
Packaged: 2019-02-22 23:58:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13177977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jayilave/pseuds/jayilave
Summary: Lance knows well where his lane is, has always stayed within the lines but, as the lines begin to blur he struggles to keep his head on straight.His thoughts have been invaded, a new ability he's gained and must learn to control. Just like his predecessor.





	1. Chapter 1

“AHHHH!” A loud shriek pierced the otherwise silent ship, starling the occupants from their state of relaxation. The paladins sprinted towards the source of the sound in a panic, all finding themselves in front of Lance’s door, panting, weapons at the ready.

Shiro, who arrived first, burst through the door and scanned the room for immediate danger. Seeing the room empty he relaxed and moved further into the room that smelt distinctly of sea. 

He rushed over to Lance who was slumped over his desk, signs of his previous tasks pushed to the floor, the others close behind. Lance was on the floor, curled up in pain, sweat streamed off him in fountains. 

“Lance? Can you hear me?” Shiro asked firmly, he got no response. He reached his biological hand down and onto Lance’s forehead, hissing as he got burnt. 

“He’s burning.” 

Hunk ran out in worry, headed for Coran and the healing pods. Shiro quickly picked Lance up but almost dropped him when Lance began thrashing around, weak whimpers making their way through his lips as his face screwed up in pain. 

The remaining team sprinted out of the room, Shiro careful not to jostle Lance too much as they made their way to the medical bay. Ahead of them they saw Coran quickly setting up one of the pods. 

"Does he need a suit?“ Pidge asked in a rush and Coran shook his head. 

“We can do that if he needs long term recovery!” Coran said and opened the pod, Shiro handed Lance over to Coran who gently placed him in the pod. It hissed close and immediately began scanning. 

"What happened to Lance?“ Allura asked after a tense silence, Keith looked up. 

"We’re not sure,” Keith said and Hunk quickly added on. 

“We just heard his scream and then we found him on the floor,” Hunk said and twisted his fingers together nervously. “Maybe it’s a fit?”

“The pod is almost finished scanning.” Coran said and a loud beep resonated from the machine, the team huddled around as Coran read the symbols popping up on the monitor. Corans twirled his moustache in confusion. “It’s not detecting anything wrong… Just a heightened magnetic energy coming from his brain.”

“What would that mean?” Pidge asked as she tried to read the report. 

“It may be a migraine,” Coran suggested and sighed. “But having him in the pod will not help him any, we’ll have to pull him out.”

“….” The paladins watched in unsure silence as Coran pressed a few buttons and he pod once again opened, Lance slumped out and Coran caught him. He carried him over to a bed and winced when Lance moaned and grasped his head.

“My boy,” Coran whispered and Lance’s eyes slowly- painfully- opened. 

“Coran, my head hurts.” Lance said and winced. “What’s the matter? Why is everyone talking?” 

“No one’s talking.” Shiro whispered and Lance cried out in pain. 

“You’re all talking too much, stop, it hurts.” Lance whined and curled up into himself.

Everyone stayed silent, staring at Lance in worry. 

“Please.” Lance moaned out in pain before his eyes fell shut once more and he slumped into the bed. Everyone looked at each other but before anyone could talk Allura ushered them all except Coran out of the room.

Coran hadn’t the slightest clue what was wrong with the paladin.

\---

Lance awoke, the blank ceiling staring back at him, as if to taunt his existence. He heard whispers, silent murmurs pass through his mind. But he felt nothing but the slight, dull pain in his mind.

He really needed a drink.

So, he got up- wincing at a sudden pain that passed through his mind- and made his way towards the kitchen. The whispers grew louder and Lance tried to block them out- but he couldn’t- they were at the forefront of his mind, demanding attention. He still couldn’t make out what they were, but he had to wonder if he were simply hearing things, if he had gone crazy. Gotten some type of cabin fever in space.

He finally made it to the kitchen but he winced as one of the voices took prevalence over the others, he began to recognise the voice. The worried thoughts, endless with questions, filled with an intelligent undertone. Pidge.

He had no clue why he was hearing Pidge. Maybe he had banged his head, maybe he truely was going crazy. Or maybe Pidge was simply talking loud.

The kitchen was empty when he made it there, he quickly got himself a drink of water before gulping it down and filling the cup once more. Then he made his way out, going in search of the others.

He first found Keith, Keith’s voice got louder and Lance clutched his head in pain. Keith turned and raised his hand to greet Lance but dropped it when Lance ran out of the room.

On his way back to his room he bumped into Pidge. Whispers ran through Lance’s mind like a scream and Lance cried out, unused to the invasion of his mind. Pidge held her arms out for Lance in worry but cried out when he bolted from the scene.

He finally made it to his room, Lance locked the door behind him and slid onto the floor, tears pouring from his blood shot eyes. The whispers in his head calmed down, every now and then a more alert and clear voice would cut through the canopy of murmurs and every time Lance would wince.

He was going crazy. Officially bonkers. Lance pulled at his hair desperately.

‘Where is Lance?’ Lance whipped his head around in search of the posh voice. It was Allura. 

‘He’s probably in his room.’

There’s no way Lance had heard Allura talking through the door. He was loosing his mind. 

‘Was this his room?’

Lance shook his head, there was no way he had heard any of that. But surely, a knock sounded and Lance yelped in shock. A variety of sentences came through to Lance’s mind and lance blinked back painful tears. “Lance?” The muffled voice came through the door and Lance wavered.

There were other words being spoken, some he couldn’t catch others he could get a vague meaning of. But none of them spoken aloud, none of them muffled through the metal wall separating them. All of them in Lance’s mind.

Lance opened the door and Allura took in his tearful, dishevelled appearance and blinked in surprise. “Lance, are you feeling fine?” ‘He looks bad, maybe I should cut them all some slack’

“Yeah. It’s just a head ache but the others might appreciate a break too.” Lance answered absent-mindedly.

“Pardon?”‘Did I miss a part of the conversation?’ Now Lance was confused.

“No…. You didn’t miss any of the conversation?” Lance said questioningly and Allura gasped. 

“Did you hear that?” Allura asked and Lance frowned. ‘Can you hear this?’

“Yeah” Lance asked looked at Allura weirdly. “Are you feeling alright?”

“I didn’t say that aloud.” Allura answered and frowned. ‘Watch my lips.’

Her lips didn’t move, not even an inch. Yet he could still hear her. 

“…..” Lance stared at her in horror as more thoughts flooded his mind, thoughts of her home planet, thoughts of her life before. But mainly her hatred for those who destroyed her planet. Hatred for Zarkon.

All thoughts she couldn’t stop, they were a constant stream. Never ending.

“Lance, please don’t freak out, it’ll make this all worse.” Allura tried to calm as she noticed the hazy look in Lance’s eyes. Sweat formed between Lance’s brows and he looked faint. 

“I-I can read- your mind?” Lance questioned and Allura looked as lost. 

“Possibly” Allura said and looked down. ‘I’ll have to see if Coran knows about this.’

Allura left. Lance concentrated on the whispers passing through his mind. They were his teammates.

Hunk’s anxious stream of though. Keith’s brash word. Pidge’s blunt though process and Shiro’s tortured whispers.

All within Lance’s brain, waiting to be deciphered. Lance rubbed his temple, trying to rid the headache.

Lance could read minds.

\---

Lance cautiously made his way down the hallway of the ship, headed to the medical bay. Everyone was already there, waiting for Lance. Lance knew that of course.

He walked through the door and cringed at the flood of voices. Thoughts mixed with real conversation, leaving Lance in a muddled haze.

He could hear many things directed his way, thoughts and actual words as the team crowded around him. 

“My boy,” Coran’s calm voice pierced through the confusion and Lance focused on him, feeling a hand on his shoulder. “Listen to my voice only.”

The other paladins had stopped talking and Coran walked closer. “Do you feel the separation?”

Lance nodded, feeling the voices recede. There was a distinct wall between his own consciousness and their thoughts.

Coran took Lance’s face into his hands. “Now, focus on pushing the voices away, thickening that wall.”

Lance did as told, pushing his friends worries and thoughts and secrets away. Wincing when a particular thought would yell out. Finally, the thoughts receded and all they were was a small whisper in the back of his mind.

Lance released a breath he didn’t know he was holding and grabbed Coran’s arms for support. “Breathe my boy,” Coran whispered and Lance felt like crying.

The headache was gone. 

“There will always be a wall beween your thoughts and ours,” Coran stated and patted Lance’s back. “Just remember that and use it to control it.”

“How did you know that?” Lance asked after a long pause and Coran smiled sadly.

“I should have realised sooner,” Coran looked down in thought. “It’s a trait the former blue paladin gained, after all.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Take a deep breath,” Coran ordered and Lance did as told. Inhale, control.

Focus.

Lance exhaled as he tried to grasp at the strings of his mentor’s mind. The very fabric of Coran. It felt wrong at first, to try and control his friend but Coran assured him that it was a necessary part of his training.

The strings, Lance could feel- no, see them- he could see them. He couldn’t feel them, it was as though they were separated from him by a thin veil of glass. Lance was unable to get to them.

It was as if it was daunting him with the fact that he could get them, but he wasn’t allowed. Lance reached, growing more and more frustrated with every minute he was repelled.

“Arg!” Lance yelled in frustration, making Coran jump in fright. “Are you sure I can even do this?!”

“Yes, he’s sure, Lance” Allura walked into the room and Lance jumped. “Blayatz- the former blue paladin- could. Although I was told it was through Phoebs of training.”

“I don’t have Phoebs.” Lance whined and flopped down on the floor.

“None of us do.” Allura stated and smiled down at Lance. “It’d be a huge leg up from where we currently are but don’t put too much stress on yourself. Mental training is much more strenuous than physical training”

“But!” Coran interrupted. “Lance has been making significant progress!” Coran added. “He can already do telekinesis with small objects!”

“Thats great!” Allura exclaimed. “The others will be coming in soon, so get ready for training, Lance.”

“Sure thing princess,” Lance said easily.

\---

“Lance is a work of god,” Coran’s voice said robotically and Lance slumped over, a quiet whoop of celebration made it’s way out of his mouth. Sweat lined his brows and Lance groaned at the headache forming in his brain.

Coran stared at Lance in shock and cheered happily. “You did it!”

“I did, huh” Lance stared up at the ceiling. “I DID IT?!”

Lance jumped up and looked at Coran excitedly. They paused while the looked at each other for a moment before bolting out of the room together.

“Princess!” Coran yelled as they found her in the controls room. 

“Yes Coran?” Allura turned and looked at the panting pair.

“I did it,” Lance said and laughed. “I controlled Coran.”

‘…” Allura stared in shocked silence before a sound of surprise made it’s way out of her mouth. “You….”

Lance nodded furiously. “Yeah,”

“Amazing!” Allura bellowed and looked at Coran for explanation. He just shrugged.

“Aren’t I?” Lance smirked and laughed once again. 

\--- 

The guard dropped to the floor after Lance shot him down and he smirked at Pidge who simply rolled her eyes. They crept into the control room and Lance knocked out the sentry with a swift kick, the sentry banged against the controls before slumping to the floor. Pidge plugged in her computer and began downloading the data.

This was a fairly easy mission.

Lance still stayed on his guard however. He scanned the surroundings and jolted in shock when a black blur passed through his vision, Lance’s eyes followed it uneasily and once they adjusted Lance was faced with a black cat baring strange markings in its fur. The cat had an eerie aura around it that set all of Lance’s alarms off, he was unsettled.

“Pidge… there’s a cat..” Lance whispered in legitimate concern and Pidge almost scoffed out a laugh.

“So what?” Pidge said and continued working on her computer.

“….” Lance didn’t say anything but he easily thinned the walls between his conscience and the world, opening himself to the unheard voices residing in the universe. Pidge’s voice blared loudly but Lance quickly shut her voice out. Once he tuned in, a continuous whisper sounded within his mind, as if chanting a spell and Lance shivered.

“Pidge someone else is here.”

“Can you take care of them by yourself?” Pidge asked and Lance sighed.

“Maybe, I don’t know who they are.” Lance said and raised his gun. Readying himself for an attack. The chanting’s in his mind grew stronger and Lance flinched as if ice was dumped on him as the voice directed her thoughts towards him.

‘I don’t know who you are…. but get out of my head.’ 

Lance froze, a blinding pain was sent through him and Lance tried not to cry out in pain. Who ever it was had Lance in a bind, in a deathly hold that he couldn’t escape.

After a moment the pain eased and Lance took a deep, shuddering breath.

‘Goodbye,’

The whispers were silenced.

Lance shivered once more as the chills ran up his spine.

As soon as they got back to the ship Lance demanded everyone to come to the hangars. They slowly came in and Lance frantically explained what had happened. Feeling chills crawl up his spine the whole time.

“So what you’re saying is that on this mission someone communicated with you through your mind?” Hunk summarised and Lance looked at him with a crazy look in his eyes. 

“Yes!” Lance shouted and shivered. “It felt bad. There was a black cat and everything.”

“Any clue who it was?” Shiro directed at the Altaens.

“There are quite a few species with telekinesis abilities…” Allura stated. “It’s not uncommon, you probably ran into one of them.”

“….Okay,” Lance didn’t want to let it go, but he had to. There was nothing they could do about it now. He rubbed at his temple where a resounding headache had resided since the mental attack.

“Pidge, did you get the data?” Hunk asked and Pidge nodded, they- along with Coran- left to do some technical things with the encrypted data. 

The others trickled out slowly after some more discussion. They left to do their own things but Lance stayed behind, needing to recuperate after the attack to his brain.

”Just breath,” Lance whispered to himself as he wove his shaking hands into his hair. “Breath.”

“Paladin?” Lance jumped and glanced around wildly in search of the unfamiliar voice. “Up here Paladin.”

Lance tilted his head back and upwards at the Blue Lion sat proudly over him. ”….Blue?” Lance asked hesitantly.

“Yes, my Paladin.” Blue spoke and Lance gasped. 

“You can talk?”

“Yes, my Paladin, but this is not what I wish to talk about. Soon, an unavoidable event will happen, you will no longer pilot me.”

“What do you mean Blue? I’ll always be your Paladin?” Lance posed as a question more than a statement, he was Blue’s Paladin. That’s all he was.

“That is true, and know that even when you are not my pilot you will always be my Paladin. But, when you aren’t my pilot I need you to stay safe and away from the person who mentally linked you.”

“Why? Blue, I need to know what you’re talking about-” Lance’s heart fluttered with anxious palpitations “-Please” Lance stressed and walked up to blue. He gave her a small, tender pat on the paw.

“I cannot say, Paladin.” Blue spoke. “But stay safe, and please do not mention this to the others,”

And with that Blue was gone. Lance blinked in silent shock and sat down next to her paw. He leant against it in a slack position and thumped his head backwards.

What did Blue mean? What unavoidable event was going to happen? Was someone going to be hurt, was Lance going to die? Lance’s thoughts grew even more ominous as time passed but eventually it landed on one.

Should he tell the others?

Lance knew he shouldn’t, he couldn’t betray his lion’s trust like that but what Blue had told him had seemed important. The others might need to know, it could be vital and they were in the midst of a war, not some high school rumour ring.

His running mind soon wondered away from the questions to the worries. He worried about the fact that something big- big enough to stop him from piloting blue- was going to happen.

He didn’t want that. He didn’t want anything to change. Well, he did want the war to be over and to be home. But he didn’t want any of his teammates hurt.

He just wanted everyone to be safe.

After mulling it over of a few minutes Lance decided against telling anyone. A decision made against his logical side that had told him the others needed to know. But he trusted Blue. He just needed to trust Blue and(he prayed) that everything would turn out alright.

He hoped.

That when they dust is stirred it’ll settle easily.

But, sometimes hoping wasn’t enough. The unavoidable event will still happen, Lance will still stop piloting Blue. Hoping could never stop things set in stone.

It was inevitable, and Lance didn’t like the unknown future hanging over him like an ominous cloud.

It was unnerving.


	3. Chapter 3

He didn’t tell the others, he didn’t even get a chance to before things hit the fan. The inevitable had happened, Blue had rejected Lance. It crushed him to the core, even though he had been told, even though he should have expected it, he couldn’t help the undeniable sorrow, the ever festering self-hatred boiling over. 

He had been half expecting it just to not happen, as though things would go back to normal between him and blue, even with Shiro missing. Really it was just his wishfulness, hoping to be able to hold on to the only normalcy in his life at this point. His connection with blue was the only thing keeping Lance sane.

Now he had lost even that.

In Lance’s down time, in the dark cold of the night, well the artificial nighttime the castle provided for them, Lance sat, for hours, just opening his mind channel to Blue. Not even a peep, not a single noise or even an indication that Blue was conscious of how Lance was sitting crossed legged in front of her. He tried not to be too disheartened, trying to conjure up the self-satisfaction of Blues words of affinity to Lance, of her assurances that Lance was her paladin but the only thing he could conjure up was the emptiness of her rejection.

‘Oh shush’ A growled voice sounded and Lance almost let out a scream of surprise. ‘Cub, you were not rejected by my sister, it was a choice deemed necessary.’

“Red?” Lance whispered and stood slowly, his mind running a million miles a second. He turned on his heels and sprinted out of Blues hangar. Turning sharp corners and colliding with a few walls and doors on the way Lance finally made it to Red’s hangar. The slightly smaller Lion stood proudly before him, eyes glowing and alive, as if staring into Lances soul, an intrusive feeling, yet Lance welcomed it with open arms and open mind.

‘It is a dishonour for you, a true Paladin of Voltron to be talking of rejection. The small amount of trust you have in my sister is appalling. Act up, have more faith in the Lions, if you are to pilot, you will pilot.’ Red scalded, Lance felt embarrassed to be caught in his brooding by Red, he had thought that he would only be able to talk to Blue for some reason. It had never crossed his mind to try and communicate with the other Lions.

“I’m sorry,” Lance said and looked down to his feet, “I know you accepted me, I know that I’m a Paladin of Voltron, and I know it was necessary to stop piloting Blue to form Voltron.”

Lance paused, of course he knew this was all true, but he felt his stupid heart betray him every time a yearning would call for Blue. An ache, as if an empty space needed to be filled.

‘Good, you need to stop being in your head so much.’ Ironic, Lance almost laughed but held himself back. ‘You are my Paladin, know that much, while you are still my sisters I expect you to trust me wholly’

“Of course,” Lance said with no hesitation, while his and reds bond was not deep, he would trust Red with his life. Red was now a buzzing presence in his heart and head, while not filling the empty space that once belonged to Blue, Red gave him an amount of fullness where he had been lacking before. A slight comfort in the hard times.

He was know the Red Paladin now. He did need to stop using his head so much.

Seemingly content, Red’s eyes dimmed without so much of a goodbye and Lance rolled his head around in a release of stress. Satisfied with the cracking sounds that came from his neck Lance sat on Reds paw and laid down, closing his eyes Lance opened his mind, just listening to the night noises of the castle. The occasional squeak of the mice as they scamper around, the constant and insistent string of numbers and words that undoubtedly came from Pidge’s mind as she typed away on her computer, the warm yet bitter thoughts of days at the beach with family that came from Hunk as he lay awake in bed, trying to calm his anxiety, the thoughts of abandonment and mystery, fear of what a future without Shiro would look like for them came from Keith as he fought the training bots, the incoherent stream of failure, of a home gone once long ago flew from Allura as she sat in her bed, absently trailing her finger along her cuffs, the trail of a broken and tired man, lost of his home, of his family, holding on for the billion lives at stake, for Allura came from Coran as he sat in thought, alone in the medical bay.

All of the silent noises of the castle coursed through Lance as he lay for a moment in stillness. He let his senses be overridden in a calming yet harrowing experience, he became one with the troubles of his teammates. Swaying with the pulses and bursts from his peers he found him self resounding with them all. A burst of… A burst of being came from Lance as he lay there and existed, nothing more, nothing less. He no longer resided in his mind.

He just lay, and rested himself as he let himself be overridden with thoughts, yet at the same time being barren of thoughts.

Sleep came easy enough.

\---

“Lance?”

Lance’s eyes shot open and he jumped up into a defensive position, unfortunately blood rushed to his head and Lance slumped to the floor with a groan as he clutched his head. His vision blurred Lance confusedly looked around. He was in Reds hangar. That’s right.

“What are you doing down here boy?” Coran asked. Lance blinked hazily before coughing.

“Talking to Red,” Lance’s voice was husky from sleep, but all sleepiness was abandoned as Red growled threateningly in the back of his head. “Just trying to bond a bit, she didn’t respond much.’

Lance corrected, remembering Blues warning to not tell the others of their communication and not wanting to upset the frankly frightening lion. Coran nodded, the silence resounded around them in the empty, save for them, hangar. Lance’s head throbbed once more and he tipped forward, the world blurring once more and he slouched in the embrace he was caught in. Coran.

“Ah, my head hurts.” Lance said despondently, he felt his mind slip and he fell into a cool oblivion, purple glowed around him as he turned around in a panic, Lance had ascended.

The Astral Plane.

Lance warped forward, as though he was going through a wormhole, the entire world shifting around him as he moved, in and out of his body that wasn’t present. In the distance of the darkness, he could see a figure sat on the ground, or what could be assumed to be the ground, Lance started towards the figure cautiously.

“Hello?” Lance called, the figure whipped around, as if frightened.

“La-“

“-nce? Lance wake up my boy,” Coran called as Lance woke with a jolt. Lance sunk into the warmth around him, most likely coming from Coran who still held him in his arms, and sighed, but no amount of warmth or comfort could easy Lance.

The striking lock of white hair seemed to be permanently ingrained in his mind.

Lance had found Shiro.

**Author's Note:**

> Cross posted on my [Tumblr.](https://jayilave.com/) and I finally got around to posting it here.


End file.
